Mother dearest, she made me clear out most of the study room. Found loads of stuff I totally forgot about, such as my entire collection of marbles, and all those toys I had.
Brings back memories of when I wasn't distracted by computers, or anything digital, for that matter.
Briefing for camp was quite wut, distracted by other stuff.
I has this sudden revelation during the briefing, about the camp.
What's my true intention in going for the camp? I realized I've turned my eyes away from the true motive, the true reason why I volunteered to go.
I've been talking about opportunities, but I'm certain, this camp is not one of them. I need to keep my eyes and heart fully focused on God, and the Sec Ones, not on the Snickers Conundrum.
Yes, it would really advance our friendship/relationship if I focused on her instead, but that would be the wrong intention, in coming to the camp, wouldn't it?
I feel like sharing my testimony to the kids, but I don't feel right about it. I don't have that much to say, I don't have any "big" events in my life that would be relevant to them.
I want to someday touch someone, with my testimony, of what He has done in my life, of how He changed me from an ungrateful bastard, to one that is earnestly seeking redemption.
Let's waste time,
Chasing cars,
Around our heads.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself. Everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling it brings.
And, it's the 31st again. Happy birthday, Desiree, if you're seeing this. I'm sorry for not giving you my all, and fabricating all those stories that barely justifies my absence. I hope you'll find someone who's perfect for you, and can look after you in every way that I couldn't.
It's that time of the year again. Where we reflect on the past year, what we've done, what we didn't do, relationships made, friendships strengthened, hearts broken, love found.
I don't really see many differences in my life, from now, and one year ago. I'm still without a school, I still can't play the guitar properly, I haven't made any headway in my love life.
But there is one, big, significant difference in my life. I have fully devoted myself, to live for Him, to have faith in His word, to carry out His will on Earth.
That one difference, to me, is worth one whole year. Accepting Him as my Savior is easy, but to really devote everything to Him, to give it all up, is another thing altogether.
I don't really have any resolutions for this new year, other than living my life in His image, and to follow His footsteps, glorifying His name with this Earthly body.
Actually, I do have some earthly resolutions, although I don't think I'm gonna keep to any of them.
1.Jam again with Admit One Only
2.Make some headway on the Snickers Conundrum
3.Get myself fit and ready for army
4.Plan a party for my grandparents
5.Staying happy
Honestly, even if I completed all these earthly resolutions, I wouldn't be satisfied. Not unless He looks down, and says, " Good job, son."
That's what I want. What I crave for. What I need. Acceptance. Approval. His smile.
I'm looking forward to service tomorrow. And Sunday's one. I haven't attended a TTB service in almost a month, and I'm missing it.
So here we are,
fighting, and trying to hide the scars.
I'll be home tonight,
Take a breath and softly say goodbye.
No comments:
Post a Comment