Didn't get much rest for the past few days, had night cycling on Thurs-Fri. Damn, that was tiring.
ONE Camp's gonna be my focus in this post, not some ambiguous post about random nonsense-sprouting.
Like what I said during reflections with Ocean, I didn't want to go for the camp originally, cause I was tired, blah blah. But, I made a commitment, and when I make one, I keep to it. Or I try to.
So,first day. I woke up quite late, I think. But I ended up being the first Ocean-er at church. Somehow, I was dragged into Singspiration the day before. It's wasn't because I was unwilling, it's just that I don't feel that I have that presence and knowledge to be leading "worship". Anyhow, we somehow managed to scrape through practice.
Honestly, me had nerves, lotsa nerves. I like performing, but I was sorta scared? Worship's new for me. But it went well, it was kinda cool to see everyone imitating my actions, and to hear everyone, well, almost, singing with me.
When found out who was in my group, I felt relieved, to say the least. I had like 3 other people from my previous ONE camp group, Anna, David, and Yipeng. So it was like easy to connect with them, but the rest of the group was hard to handle, in short. I hoped, before the camp started, tat my group wouldn't have like any troublemakers, but I just had to be with these two boys from FaithActs. I mean, it's not like I'm racist or anything, one of my best friend's a Malay, for crying out loud. But it's just that I feel that I can't handle these sort of characters, maybe it's my self-confidence, I don't know.
I've got nothing much to say about the following programs on the first day, other than my problems with the two FaithActs kids. They didn't follow instructions, and acted as if they were like kings. I mean, if you want to participate, go right ahead. But don't push it so such an extent where winning is everything. It's just a game, we win, we lose, there's no need to be so competitive.
I know, I'm sounding like a hypocrite here, because I'm like super competitive in soccer, but I don't blame others for everything,(at least I think I don't) and I do admit my mistakes(at least I think I do).
Oh and I found out some things about myself.
1. I must have a shower every morning, or else I'm gonna be dead and sleepy for the rest of the day.
2. Mosquitoes really do like me.
3. I don't need a sleeping bag to sleep, let alone a bed.
4. I can't remember, HAHA.
Day 2 was a mixed bag, for me. Morning was a real drag, was sleepy as hell. Tried my best for Singspiration, but it went all over too quickly. Oh well.
The mass dance was not that bad, considering that I hate dances. I think I'm beginning to change my attitudes toward certain things, one of them mass dances. The two latest mass dances I did were quite enjoyable, but I think it's that company that made it good.
The superhero race was pretty screwed, I got real pissed at the two kids again, argh. Sucks. I had to raise my voice, i.e. RC style, and it's wasn't pretty. Goddamn.
The finale night was good, however. The preps were totally last minute, I didn't even know that we had a storyline to follow. I just cobbled together some random crap, and it worked. This was the turning point of the camp, for me. I saw everyone working together, listening to Anna's, Adrian's and my instructions, and working together. And the fact that the act came out okay was nice as well.
Third day was like really lifeless. Got sorta pissed AGAIN, kids didn't want to help clear the damn canteen. Gosh, I really have to control my temper.
Was kinda surprised when my group won second, I was expecting first not. I thought we screwed it up at the race, but I think we did well, considering the problems we had, such as not having a person to really take charge all the way and bond the whole group, and friction between members in the group.
In all, I felt this camp was not that bad, although last year's was better. I actually missed them badly then, now, I just can't wait to get onto my bed. It's not that my group didn't bond well, we actually did, but it's just that I couldn't wait to see the backs of some of them.
What was my aim during this camp? I wanted to find direction. Did i find direction? No, but I found other things. I found out that I can't just stick to one group of people, there're others that need me there, for one reason or another.
Anything else that I achieved from this camp? Unity, I feel. I felt that Ocean really bonded, at least those that went. I think they all know my name now, I don't know about the spelling part, haha.
After camp was the shitzzz. Funny as hell, not just the Fairfield parts. I realized that we Ocean-ers actually do have lots of things in common, we just need to find it.
I still need my direction, and I really do need sleep. Sorry people for boring you for this long novel again, but don't expect me to change. Live with it. :)
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