All that's left of me, is what I pretend to be.

Since this site is so dusty and untouched it probably belongs in a museum that belongs in another museum, I'm gonna spill it all here.

My life just took a rather drastic change. In three months time, or less, I'll be off to serve the nation! Hooray.

Honestly, I don't know what I want to be, what I want to do, who I want to become anymore. I barely even feel like doing anything much now.

I don't have the focus to study, I don't want to go out and take crappy orders from an employer, but I certainly don't want to sit around and do nothing.

In short, I don't have control. Pretty ironic, given the title of my blog.

I had a plan. For my life. Or something that passed off as a plan. By 20, I was gonna have a Diploma in Mass Comm, an internship in Mediacorp waiting for me, hopefully a few cameos in mid-day dramas, and 1 or 2 comic stories on the way to reviews, and hopefully publishing.

Look what I've been reduced to. A self-pitying douche, staying at home all day, trying to sound profound by using big words, getting stuffed on potato chips and chocolate, watching TV shows on my computer, and not doing anything to save his own life from going down.

I need to start. But how? When?

Maybe army will change me, for the better. It'll give me time to think things over, away from distractions, and evaluate my life. A new start.

I know it's not too late, but I just don't want to. "There's still time later" & "Wait" are my favorite words. Is there still time later for this? Can it wait?

I need help. And I hope I can get through all this, come out alive, and say"I made it."

Until then, here's to me trying to get my life in order.